watering can

It is truly a sad state of mind to be broken and not realize it. This was indeed the state in which I was living.  However, like the lost son, I was slowly coming to myself.  The reckless living had all but ceased and deep in my soul I began to feel that something was indeed missing.  And if I were to be honest with myself I would know that something was God.  But there were still areas of my life that I needed to fix before I said yes to Jesus.  There were behaviors that I needed to stop.  I was very aware of this but I did not know how to begin that process.

My life continued, but with each day I felt more and more like God was calling for me. With each sunrise and sunset I could feel God tugging at my heart.  And you would think that I would have gone to my mother and shared what I was feeling and asked her what I should do.  But I did not.

Then God sent an angel into my life. She was a 5’9”’ inch bundle of life.  She was a free spirit.  She was funny.  She was full of energy.  She was a people magnet.  She could (and did) talk to anyone.  And when she prayed………….OH MY GOODNESS! We met in the military and I was immediately drawn to her.  One of the first things we talked about was No More Sheets by Prophetess Juanita Bynum.  I had never heard of it but was intrigued after my angel and I began to discuss it.  My angel began to witness to me and I shared with her that I wasn’t ready.  There were some things I needed to fix first.  Some things I needed to stop doing.  She said,  in a matter of fact kind of way, ‘if you could stop or fix anything then Jesus’ death was in vain.’  Didn’t understand what she meant but I wasn’t swayed.  I had to do this my way.  I had to fix it first.  Then I would be ready.  The tugging at my heart continued and my new friend continued to witness.

One day I decided that I wanted to start studying the bible. I didn’t ask my mother whose walk with the Lord I admired.  I didn’t ask my new friend.  Instead, I shared it with a friend that was a different religion and she was more than oblige to study with me.  But, God had other plans.

“We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps.” ~ Proverbs 16:9


About Shannon D. Robinson

Shannon Robinson Born and raised in Baltimore, Maryland (Go Ravens!!!), I discovered early on that I am very opinionated and passionate about my opinions. This has brought on the realization for me that I think differently from most people and it took some time for me to come to grips with that unique side of me. Writing for me is often an escape. A place I can go with my thoughts and opinions and not have to concern myself with offending anyone or not agreeing with someone. My thoughts and opinions are mine and God’s and I know that He doesn’t judge me on them. My writing is a personal journey that allows me to be transparent with self (and sometimes others) as I believe that nothing I have experienced or gone through on this journey called life was meant for me to keep to myself. Somewhere there is another woman who is experiencing or has experienced the very same things, thoughts, and feelings I have and it is my prayer that my story in some small way helps her to see that she too can come through. While at the same time giving God glory for his wondrous works. I appreciate you for stopping by and sharing in my journey as I try my absolute best to navigate it as smoothly as possible; even when I come across detours and bumps along the way. ~ Hotep

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